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CARRYING MOTHER'S BURDEN

Update: 29/11/2024
 

CARRYING MOTHER'S BURDEN

 

The memories between me and mom are also very faint. There were many children in the family and there was a shortage of children, so all year round mother toiled and moiled so that her children could have enough food. That is why mom rarely got close to me or hugged me. When I was a little older, I went to live with my grandmother because she only had my mother. When being away from home, I had even less feelings for mom. I just remembered that every once in a while, when my mother came to visit my grandmother, I saw her. When my grandmother passed away and I returned to my family, my mother was also busy trading at the market. As a result, my mother and I did not develop any more feelings. I have never felt my mother's love for me for many years. Then every time I missed my mother so much, I could only cry and feel sorry for myself. When mom and dad broke up, my sister and I had to shoulder everything including family, debt, and being a fulcrum for mom! At this time, the relationship between me and mom was not much better. When everything was stable, my studies were completed, my work was put aside, I walked away, and there was not much in my memory about mom. When I returned to the pagoda to study, every time the rain fell, my eyes filled with tears because I missed home as well as my mother so much. It is because mom has “male personality” that she rarely shows affection. Therefore, it just fades away. At every Ullumbana season my heart hurt when I listen to the song: "Mother's Heart"

 

 

A rose for you

 

A rose for me

 

And a rose for those 

 

Who still have mother

 

While Mom is still here, my heart is happier

 

This bad luck may be lost, dear Mother

 

Like a flower without the sun

 

Like a child without a smile

 

I thought my life wouldn't grow any better

 

Like a sky without starlight at night...

 

I do not know when tears fall. Gradually, thanks to Buddha's teachings, I was connected with my mother. I understand Mom better and Mom also takes care of me more. There were a few times when I got angry and asked, "Don’t you love me?". Mom said, "Why don't I love my child who I gives birth?" Oh Buddha! For many years I thought my mother did not love me. But thanks to studying Buddhism, I now understand and sympathize more. Also, I know that Mom is always beside me! My mother's love is always full, but I am just not deep enough to realize it. Mom! I love you so much! The more I love my Mother, the more I promise to practice better to be mom’s religious friend, which helps her believe in and love the Buddha even more in accordance with the Dharma. Mom is now "better" than before! My mother supported pagodas, helped cook at the ashram, practiced, chanted sutra, recited Buddha name, and most importantly, she vowed to be reborn in the Western Pure Land. As a child, that is all I hope for. I pray that in this life, my mother will return to Buddha.

 

 

Let me carry mom on the shouders once

 

She has worked hard to support her children all her life

 

Let me support mom’s rest of life  

 

A mother's whole heart has carried all difficulties for her child... 

 

Resting Mom in the Dharma and bringing her back to Buddha is my career!

 

Best regards,

 

An Tâm

Translated into English by  Huỳnh Thị Khánh Phụng

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