The Cool Shade Beneath the Sky

Our presence in this world does not come from the sky or rise from the ground. We are here because our parents gave us life. Yet, most children seem to give more affection to their mother than to their father. Why is there such a difference? Both parents devote themselves to raising us, so why is the mother often loved more than the father?

When I was living at home, the love within my family felt small and common to me. It was only after I left that I began to understand how precious it truly was. After completing the Ninth-Grade, I left my family to follow my own path, choosing to enter the temple and begin monastic life. On the evening before I left, during a family meal, I stood up and asked my parents for permission to leave home and go to the monastery. As soon as I finished speaking, everyone felt silent, overcame with emotion and surprise.

That evening, the person who surprised us all the most was my father. From childhood until then, I had never once seen him cry. Yet that night, he could not hold back his tears. As he tried to continue eating, his tears kept falling into his bowl.

My mother gently said to me, “Try your best on the path you have chosen. I believe it is a good path.” When I looked at my father, he could no longer restrain himself. Through his tears, he said, “This house will always keep its door open for you. If one day you feel you cannot go on any further, come home. No one will blame you.”

At that moment, I could no longer hold back my own tears. Watching my father cry, my thoughts about him suddenly deepened. I realized then that my father is like a cool shade beneath the vast sky, quietly and silently protecting me as I walk through the harsh sunlight of life, without ever asking to be noticed.

Father is the cool shade beneath the sky.
Father is the steady support beside his child.

If it had not been for that dinner, I might never have seen my father’s tenderness. I would have continued to think that he was strict, stern, and incapable of loving me the way my mother did. My father is indeed strong and firm, but how many people truly see the vulnerability and pain their fathers carry within? He set his own rule that in front of his children, he must always remain strong, never gentle like a mother. He believed that only in this way could he guide his children to become good people. He would rather give up his children’s affection than allow them to go astray or fall behind their peers.

A few months after I had entered the temple, my mother and siblings came to visit. My mother told me, “Ever since you left, your father cries every night because he misses you. He has lost weight. When you have time, call him.” Hearing this, I felt a deep sense of guilt toward my father, and I turned that feeling into motivation to continue walking the path I had chosen.

I would like to offer a small reminder to everyone: take time to reflect on your father while he is still here. Do not wait until he is gone to feel regret. Without a father, the sky above us loses its shade. Those who still have their fathers, please cherish them. Do not let them be hurt even one more time.

Tam Hua

 Translated into English by Thai Nhuoc Don